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Ask Ashlee: I Don't Want An Open Relationship; She Says It's The Only Way

Dear Ask Ashlee,

My partner and I have been together for the last 7 years. I honestly thought we were heading in the direction of marriage until the last few months, we have been arguing nonstop. Last week, she shared that she didn’t want to lose me but that maybe we should try an open relationship, take a break and see if we can find our way back to each other. I completely disagree with this and I have shared this with her, but I am afraid that if I fight her on this too much she will eventually want to call our entire relationship quits. Do you think we can come back from this?

Not As Open As Her

Dear Not As Open,

So here’s this thing, I think anything is possible and I do mean anything. However, I would be more concerned with what I can and what I will not choose to deal with. If she needs a break from the relationship and you can handle what may or may not happen during that break, then go for it. Time and space can do a number of things; it can either bring you two closer than before, or it will help you both focus on yourselves and come to the understanding that things have come to an end and it can be ended amicably and respectfully. I suggest you decide what path you are willing to walk with her and prepare yourself to find one that may involve you walking away. If you focus more on her needs and what will make her happy, you lose yourself in the process and that won’t be good for you or for her. I hope this helps.

Love & Light,


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